You Are Stronger Than You Know

And here's why

I think when it all settles, and you watch the mountains—once too high, too heavy, too far away crumbling into tiny fragments of dust, dissolving into new air—you realise you are stronger than you ever thought possible.

I was strong because I had no other choice.

That's what I tell people when they ask how I managed to get through losing both parents and being diagnosed with breast cancer in the same year.

I was strong because, at the time, I was a single parent to a nine year old daughter.

But, in the year I was in and out of the hospital, I wasn’t thinking about my strength; I was focusing on hers.

So, perhaps strength is helping others feel less afraid.

Perhaps strength is an act of love.

Life often throws unexpected situations at you: the sudden loss of loved ones, illness, the end of a relationship.

A dark season can arrive so suddenly that you have nowhere else to hide but within the shadows.

What I have learned is that these times can also deepen your connection with yourself. Somehow, you emerge stronger because you have processed it in your own way.

Something shifts.

You begin to notice that healing would not have occurred had you not turned within.

You realise that having the courage to admit you are afraid—afraid you're not strong enough, afraid you're alone, afraid you'll never find a way back—is an act of strength.

There can be no love or acceptance of yourself if you are not willing to feel vulnerable enough to tell yourself you are afraid.

I don’t know what strength looks or feels like for you, but I do know this:

Sometimes, you don’t realise how much strength it takes to suppress all your fears and hold yourself together.

Sometimes, when you look back at the most challenging times, you remember that something inside you always emerged and held you up when you needed it the most.

Sometimes, strength is not about how many steps you’ve taken but how you took them.

Sometimes, strength is knowing that no matter how you are feeling, you are still enough.

Sometimes, strength is the decision to love yourself a little harder.

Tender reminder:

Life can feel hard.

It can take a sudden turn like the weather and you don’t think it will ever get brighter again.

But it does get brighter and you get stronger—you come back to life.

Be grateful for the storms.

They may sweep through your bones, take you to the darkest places, leave you screaming, unheard, misunderstood.

But when you stay rooted to the core of who you are, you always return home stronger than before.

Cultivating strength

♡ Stay close to your core values and integrity - even when no one is watching. Strength is remaining true to what matters most to you.

♡ Stay close to the ones who believe in you - they will remind you of your worth when you can’t find it within yourself.

♡ Remember how far you have already come - don’t overlook the lessons you collected out of the dark times.

♡ Know who you are and where you are going. You will reach where you want to go when you know where you want to go.

♡ Stay aligned with your vision, don’t allow a painful season to steal your dreams from your trembling hands.

♡ Feel everything, even if you’re terrified. It is the fear of feeling it all that perpetuates more fear.

♡ Get back into your body. Tap, breathe, meditate - you have a well of inner wisdom that you can’t always hear beneath the voice of fear.

You have already done hard things.

When you learn how to move past your pain body you will get to see, experience and know your true self which is already whole, complete, fierce, creative, magnetic, and unconditionally loving.

Trust yourself.

A quote I ADORE:

“I do not understand the mystery of grace — only that it meets us where we are and does not leave us where it found us.”
― Anne Lamott

A lesson I’ve been reflecting upon lately:

Loving yourself means allowing yourself to be as you are in each moment.

Accepting how you feel and not trying to change anything until you have felt it all is the most beautiful thing you can do for yourself.

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My embodied writing course Going Within: a writing course for deepening the relationship you have with yourself” starts on Monday 4th to Friday 8th December. For more information, see here. The course is valued at £222 but if you are a paid subscriber, you will have free access to it! Learn how I manage anxiety and use the power of embodied writing and energy work to create more presence and joy.

There will also be a live zoom call a week after the course where we will do a meditation and talk about any parts of the course you have questions or reflections on.

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Wednesday’s post: Going Within monthly healing guide - November

Within is a weekly (news) letter. Please feel free to share parts of the letter that connect with you on social media, or send to someone you love. If you enjoy and benefit from my work, I invite you to become a paid subscriber. This is a reader-supported offering and I’m so grateful for your presence here. To find out more about my books and my healing work, visit my website.